My Testimony

A testimony is a formal written or spoken statement. It is like one given in a court of law under oath. The testimony basically consists of saying what we actually saw, heard or experienced. A false testimony is simply anything which did not happen. A testimony is not based on assumptions or probabilities but on facts/evidences. I hesitated to write on it down because of my pride. No one likes to be exposed. But because I was blessed by the testimony of some humble men, I found the strength to tell about what Jesus did for me. I would like through this post testify about how my life was before knowing Christ, what He did for me and how my life is now.

• Before I knew Jesus

I am not a guy like Nicky Cruz who had a powerful testimony to share. To be honest, I lived a rather good life. However, there are things I did which I am ashamed of. I did not want to talk about them because I am not proud of these things I did. These things I am not proud of are called “sins”. I went to church with my parents since I was a kid and the sermons I heard were pretty good and had much wisdom. I never had sex with a girl or ever kissed one but I was exposed to movies I should not have watched and this made me guilty.

My biggest struggle was with spirituality itself. I was in the church but yet ignorant about who Jesus really was.

• When I met Jesus

My encounter with Jesus was gradual. My life did not change all of a sudden like many of those who turned to Christ. I had many questions about Christianity and wondered if it was the truth. I looked at the teachings in other religions and concluded that it could not be the way to God. The fruits produced by these religions in the lives of these people proved that it could not be the way to God. My main issue with Christianity was Jesus’ claim of being God. I could not really digest it. It was not logical to me. How could God die on a cross? How could I be sure that the disciples did not concoct together to invent a story about Jesus? How could I know that the bible was true? How could Jesus’ death on the cross remove my sins? No one could give me the right answers to my questions. So all these question marks on Christianity were leading me to agnosticism (one who cannot prove nor disprove the existence of God).

I came across a verse in the bible which God said to Israel:

“I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow.”

I said to God, will you also reveal yourself to me? And oh yeah He faithfully responded.

I had doubts about the veracity of the scripture because it was written by men like me. However, the stuff it said about man’s sin was really true. I identified myself to what it described. It was the truth. The teachings in the scripture really touched me because it revealed my sinful nature. I believed that the One called the Father in the bible was God. But it was still confusing in my mind that Jesus could also be God. It appeared to me that Christianity had more than 1 God and this still made me skeptic. For me Jesus was just a sacrifice for sins and I had doubts that His sacrifice could really forgive me. I did not know Jesus. So here I was on a quest for the truth about Him. I wanted to sit down and have a fresh look at Christianity and question it. My life drastically changed when I started to study the Epistle to the Hebrews. I discovered Jesus as God and bowed to my knees and asked God to forgive me for all my stupid questions about who Jesus was. The fact that I knew that Jesus was God made it evident to me to believe in everything He taught. I guess this was the moment I really gave Jesus all of my life. I wanted Jesus to rule my life and I wanted to obey Him.

• After I met Jesus

It was a radical change when I acknowledged Jesus as my God. I wondered why no one ever exposed Jesus in His Sovereignty. I discovered the perfection of His sacrifice to even cleanse my tainted conscience of my past sins (Hebrews 9:14, 10:22).  There is no one who can point the finger to me because of my past sins. It is now what God thinks about me which matters. I am now a free and fulfilled man. I have joy in my heart and know God loves me. God has blessed me through so much teachings in His Word. I do not deserve all the blessings God has given me. I am not a slave of any sin. If you think that it is IMPOSSIBLE to get rid of sins that are enslaving you, I will tell you that you know nothing about what Jesus can do. It’s never too late.

I now take pleasure in writing about His goodness and love.

Jesus has also given me this assurance that He will care for me for my daily needs and this helps me to remove this burden called worries. I am a satisfied man, God is all I need to be happy. I have now a purpose in life – doing God’s will. I found out that doing God’s filled up the emptiness in my heart.

I do not know how sinful your life has been but one thing I know is that Jesus came to give a brand new heart to the broken hearted, hope to the hopeless and vitality to a meaningless messed up life. You might have failed in your studies, relationship or career and now you feel inadequate or unfulfilled. With deep conviction and assurance I can tell you that these are not what life is all about. You have not yet failed in your life. God wants to give sense to your life and make you a fulfilled individual by serving Him. The greatest failure is to push away this God who wants to overflow you with His love and renew you.